Thinking of the Life of St. Ignatius of Loyola on His 470th Memorial Anniversary

 They say, all Saints used to be sinners like us. Of course, St. Mary is the exception as she is the Immaculate Conception. She did not let sin creep into her during all her earthly life. But all other Saints were once sinners. St. Peter, the first Pope, was, too. In fact, his sinfulness tried to reject Jesus, saying, “Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man”(Luke 5:8). In response, Jesus foresaw this sinful Galilean fisher man to be a great disciple and said to him, “Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men”(Luke 5:10). And he began catching men (i.e. Acts 2:41).

St. Ignatius of Loyola, born in the Basque region of Spain on October 23, 1491, was a sinner like St. Peter, though he was not a fisherman. He hailed from a noble family, unlike Peter. He was a knighted solder, known for his gusto and vainglory, as Peter was a disciple with impulsivity and empty pride (i.e. Luke 22:33). Perhaps, as a young man, Ignatius was dreaming to be a well-respected and admired general of the Spanish army. However, on May 20, 1521, at the Battle of Pamplona, fighting against France as an officer with valor, a French cannon ball smashed his leg. What was shattered was not just his leg but his ambition in military career. 

The injury was so grave. Ignatius could have been dead. But, he miraculously survived and underwent multiple painful orthopedic surgeries. Back then, there was no anesthesia. Though these operations did not completely fix his leg, Ignatius was able to make revery. 

In fact, it was during this convalescence from a near-mortal battle wound that Ignatius’ long journey of conversion began.

Being bed-ridden, Ignatius was bored. There was no smart phone. There was no TV.  So he asked his sister to bring him some books so that he would kill some time. Then, she gave him books on the lives of the Saints and on the life of Christ. These were not books he wanted to read. His would have preferred to read on lives of great military heroes and chivalry. But better than nothing. So, he began reading these books on the Saints and Jesus. At that time, who would have ever thought that Ignatius would become one of the Saints. 

Though reluctantly at first, as Ignatius read these books, he found himself drawn to the lives of the Saints, especially, St. Francis of Assisi, who was also a soldier once, and the life of Christ. He began to think of himself serving Christ the King, rather than the Spanish crown. During this time, Mary, holding baby Jesus, appeared to him in a vision. This personal encounter with Jesus and Mary was a turning point for him to let go off his previous ambition for self-glory through military career but to follow and serve Christ for his glory.  Like St. Paul, Ignatius crucified his old sinful self with Christ and found Christ in him (i.e. Galatians 2:20. It means he died to sin and live a new life in Christ (Romans 6:11).

The healing of Ignatius was not only physical but spiritual as his conversion began while physical convalescence was taking place. When he was healed to be well enough to step out of his house, he was filled with fresh zeal to serve Christ the King. In March 1522, he left his home of comfort and luxury for good to search for his way to serve the King. In a way, this is similar to the way Gautama left his palace to find a way to be free from suffering, leading him to become Buddha. 

First, Ignatius surrendered his sword, which was symbolic to his pride, to the Virgin of Montserrat and kept the vigil before the alter on the night from March 24 to 25, 1522. It is a statue of Mary with baby Jesus. Then he gave his clothes to the poor and put a poor man’s cloth, Ignatius, indeed, became a blessed anav (i.e. Matthew 5:3).

At that point, Ignatius was thinking to make his pilgrimage to Jerusalem through begging. But before heading to the Holy Land, he felt the need to go through intense penance. This led him to solitude in Manresa and entered a cave there. This is where Ignatius conversion became so intense, for he struggled with intensifying carnal desires as he became extremely ascetic in his efforts to purify himself. He experienced severe depression and spiritual distress. He was even on the verge of despair and could have committed suicide in the cave. Though his soul was shaken, it was not shattered. There was something that sustained him though he deprived himself of food and water.

It was August 1522, when he was sitting on the bank of the Cardoner River in Manresa, looking at the river flow, the Holy Spirit began to illuminate his soul, after about 5 months of desolation. He had a mystical vision on the banks of the river. The vision was rather metaphysical. However, Ignatius understood what it meant. It was a realization that the presence of God can be found in all things. In this realization, Ignatius saw how intricately God has been involved in His Creation all the time. It is not a form of pantheism, as espoused by Baruch Spinoza. Rather, it is about God’s sustaining providence in His Creation (i.e. Matthew 10:29-30), because all things were created were created by and through God and all things are held together in Him (Colossians 1:16-17). In fact, it was through Christ the Theos-Logos that all things were created (John 1:3, 10; 1 Corinthians 8:6). For this reason, Jesus uses many things in Creation as metaphors to explain our relation to God (i.e. John 10:1-18, 25-30; 15:1-11) and His Kingdom (i.e. Matthew 13: 4-50).

This mystical illuminative experience on the banks of the Cardoner River in Manresa was a very powerful turning point in his ongoing conversion and spiritual growth. He realized that he did not need to seclude himself in a cave and remain ascetic to encounter God. This also prompted him to write his thoughts and reflections on his experience in Manresa, and this became the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola.  Through this writing, we see that his desolation, where he experiences series of crises, was followed by consolation, in which he found himself as a new person in Christ, seeing God, His providence, in all things in the Creation. 

Upon this, Ignatius set his eyes firmly on Jerusalem as he left Manresa. However, his path of spiritual growth and pilgrimage was never smooth even though he was enlightened and grace-filled.  He continued to face challenges. 

Having been renewed in Manresa, Ignatius managed to make his way to Jerusalem. However, his wish for this pilgrimage to the Holy City was outright rejected, He was ordered to leave the city by the Franciscans that held the papal jurisdiction over Jerusalem. It was when the Holy Land was ruled by the Ottoman Empire, and the Franciscans were commissioned by Pope to ensure safety of pilgrims. The situation was always touchy as there was a tension between the Church and the Ottoman Empire in the Holy City. Because of this, they had the authority to reject anyone who was suspected to disturb peace and compromise safety there. Perhaps, the Franciscans ordered Ignatius to leave Jerusalem for his safety. Or, maybe he was seen as a potential trouble-maker. Regardless, it must be extremely disappointing for him to be ordered to leave, as he did not make his pilgrimage out of whim but rather through his discernment for God’s will, thinking to live there for the rest of his life. 

This rejection experience actually served to open his eyes to what was lacking in him. That was education. And he returned to Spain to pursue formal education. It was 1524, and he was already 33 years old. He swallowed his pride and humbled himself to sit with a bunch of teen agers in an elementary Latin class to begin. By that time, he was also thinking for priesthood. 

Upon completing his Latin courses in Barcelona, Ignatius enrolled at the University of Alcalá in 1526. While studying there, he began teaching, especially on the Spiritual Exercises. However, the inquisition found his teaching suspicious of unorthodoxy and imprisoned him for this. He was ordered not to teach until he would complete his university education in theology and philosophy. He transferred to the University of Salamanca afterward to complete his required education in 1527. At this institution, he was in trouble with the inquisition and imprisoned, too. 

Too many troubles to continue university education? Not for Ignatius. Remember, he is a man of gusto. And his zeal to pursue God and grow in faith was renewed through his experience in Manresa. He sure was not a quitter. So all these troubles at Spanish universities prompted him to leave Spain and to study further in France. 

Ignatius, then, enrolled at the University of Paris, where St. Albert the Great, and his student, St. Thomas Aquinas, taught, in 1528, determined to become a priest. He earned a bachelor’s degree in 1533 and a master of arts degree in 1535. He was already 43 years old to put all the minimum credentials under his belt to be ordained and teach as a priest. 

What Ignatius gained at the University of Paris was not just necessary education to serve Christ as a priest in his Church but life-long friends, Peter Faber and Francis Xavier. It was Ignatius who introduced the Spiritual Exercises to both these friends, hoping the Exercises would help them seek a life of service for God. 

Though Peter Faber engaged in the Spiritual Exercises and was ordained as a priest on May 30, 1534, Francis Xavier persistently declined to accept the Exercises because he was more interest in pursuing worldly wealth as Spain was expanding its hegemonic sphere. To his, Ignatius pressed on Francis on these words of Jesus:

What profit would there be for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? Or what can one give in exchange for his life? (Matthew 16:26).

Thus, Francis Xavier’s worldly interest was shattered and he also agreed to go through the Spiritual Exercises. Upon this Ignatius, Peter, Francis, and four other men took a private vow for a life of poverty, chastity, and service, on August 15, 1534 at Montmartre. 

In 1537, Ignatius and his companions, including Peter Faber and Francis Xavier, moved to Venice. It was originally to sail for the Holy Land. However, this plan had to be canceled due to a naval conflict between the Republic of Venice and Ottoman Empire. Then, they stayed in Venice and engaged in various pastoral services, especially for the sick, the poor, and the marginalized. They even took demeaning tasks to take care of those who were in great needs with loving compassion and humility.  This was, indeed, the Jesuits in its prenatal phase, formed out of the pastoral service reflecting these words of Jesus:

Whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me (Matthew 25:40).

The way Ignatius formed the Jesuits has its roots very similar to the Franciscans and the Vincentians – caring for those who in greater needs among us as a service to the Lord. 

In this year, 1537, on July 24, Ignatius of Loyola, Peter Faber, and Francis Xavier, together with Simão Rodrigues, Nicholas Bobadilla, Jean Codure and Claude Le Jay. All of them had been with Ignatius from Paris. And out of these seven dedicated men, the Society of Jesus, the Jesuits, was formed, while they remained diligently engaged in pastoral services in Venice. 

On September 25, 1540, Pope Paul III approved the Jesuits as an official religious order in the Catholic Church, when Protestantism was sweeping across Europe, issuing his papal bull, “Regimini militantis Ecclesiae”.  This means that the Jesuits are to play a vital part of the militant Church for the governance of the Christendom, fighting against heresies and bringing those who are lost back to faith, utilizing the Spiritual Exercises, while committed to take care of those least among us. 

By the time he died on July 31, 1556, the Jesuits grew to about 1,000 men out of the seven men who took a private vow in 1534. This certainly makes Ignatius a fisher of men (i.e. Luke 5:11). With his companions in the Jesuits, Ignatius, is certainly one of the fishers of men (Matthew 4:19; Mark 1:17).

Ignatius was “cannonized” on May 20, 1521, at the Battle of Pamplona, marking the beginning of his journey of conversion and spiritual growth. And this spiritual journey from a life of sin took him to the sainthood, as he was canonized on March 12, 1622, by Pope Gregory XV, together with Francis Xavier, Philip Neri, and Teresa of Ávila. 

The life of St. Ignatius of Loyola is a good example of what these words of St. Paul can mean:

The one who searches hearts knows what is the intention of the Spirit, because it intercedes for the holy ones according to God’s will. We know that all things work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. For those he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, so that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined he also called; and those he called he also justified; and those he justified he also glorified (Romans 8:27-30).

St. Ignatius was certainly one whom Christ saw the interior of his heart and called him to seek God’s will on him through the “cannonization” on May 20, 1521. Certainly, Mary the Blessed Virgin, helped him turn his heart to her Son, Jesus, as she appeared in his vision with the Son during his convalescence from the “cannonization”. So he began to journey away from a life of sin to holiness. 

After he left his home of comfort in Loyola to embark on this journey , he also stripped his life of pride and wealth symbolically as he surrendered his sword to Mary,  leaving it before the statue of la Santa Maria de Montserrat, realizing that he was no longer an earthly knight but on his way to serve as a knight for Christ the King for his Kingdom. He was able to sustain himself by the grace of God during the period of desolation in Manresa. Though he practiced extreme asceticism to purify himself, he did not slip to a dualistic heretical spiritualism, like Manichaeism. He emerged out of the period of spiritual crises with the illumination to find God in all things in the Creation. This was, indeed, the post-desolation consolation. However, this did not make his life a smooth sail at all. 

Though he thought to live in the Holy City to complete his journey toward holiness, Ignatius was rejected in Jerusalem, forced to “recalculate” his direction. So he began his formal education upon returning to Spain. But, it was full of challenges, as he was troubled by the inquisition twice. But this let him further “recalculate” his direction of the journey and took him to the University of Paris, where he found invaluable “treasures” , completing necessary education for his vocational calling and life-long companions. Otherwise, how else could this once-sinner of Basque found the Jesuits and be canonized? 

None of his life experiences since his birth in 1491 to his death in 1556 was an accident. Not a coincidence. As St. Thomas Aquinas argues in Summa Theologiae (Prima Pars, Question 22, Article 4), bits and pieces of Ignatius’ life experiences were rather contingencies to the necessity of God’s will, directed by His providence. The Ignatian motto, “Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam”, indeed, reflects this truth. 

Yes, through thse contingencies that Ignatius experienced in his life, God worked for the good of those who love Him had have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28) , which is what St. Thomas Aquinas sees as necessity. 

This year, 2026, marks the 470th memorial anniversary of St. Ignatius of Loyola! 

St. Ignatius of Loyola, help us keep enduring zeal as you have! 

”急に具合が悪くなる“という現象は偶然か必然か？ 九鬼とヘーゲルの哲学と確率論でもって考える

 前回のブログ記事（”かもしれない”という理不尽な偶然を理に適った必然に変えていく生き方　－哲学者、宮野真生子さんの生き方から学ぶ）で哲学者、宮野真生子さん、と文化人類学者、磯野真穂さん、のメール書簡のやりとりを編集した、“急に具合が悪くなる“という本について触れました。この本にある宮野さんと磯野さんのメールのやりとりから、宮野さんが乳がんとどう闘病しながら宮野さんらしく生き抜いたかが浮かび上がってきます。がんが転移してから医師から”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“と言われたことに対し、宮野さんはそれをどう受け止め、それに対し、どう意思決定し、息を引き取られるまで自分にできることをやり通したかというところが注目したいところです。前回の記事で、私はこうした宮野さんの”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“という医師からの”警告“への対応を森田療法的な現実の受け入れ、そして、この受け入れた現実（医師から”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“と言われたこと）を認知行動療法的に建設的な方向へ認識し直すことで、この現実が宮野さんの人生の質（Quality of Life：QOL）を損なう一因とさせることなく、精一杯宮野さんらしく生き抜くことができたのか考察してみました。その際、宮野さんの研究の根底にある九鬼周造が論じた偶然と必然にも少し触れました。私はここで、宮野さんは”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“という人生の質を損ないかねないことを不条理な偶然だととらえ、”自分は不幸だ“という考えに陥る確率があるが、そうではなく、森田療法や認知行動療法に沿った対応をしたので、自分は不幸ではなく不運であったのであると認識することができ、それ故、人生の質を損なわずに生き抜かれたのだと考えました。そして、これは不条理な偶然と思われる事象を森田療法的に受け入れ、認知行動療法的に認識し直すことで理に適った必然にすることができると結論付けました。

さて、今回のこの記事では少し偶然と必然というテーマを軸に“急に具合が悪くなる”という事象について確率論的に考察したいと思います。

では、急に具合が悪くなる、という現象は偶然なのでしょうか、それとも、必然なのでしょうか？

それはケースバイケース、であってこうした問いに一般論的に白黒を判別するように明確に答えられないというのが臨床家の見解でしょう。これに対し、何で医師ははっきりと偶然か必然か答えられないのか？、と思う方もいることでしょう。”私は助かるのでしょうか？“と患者さんから問われた医師が自分では”助かる“と信じていても”ええ、心配なさらないでください。助かりますよ“と言わない場合があるのと同じことです。

ウイリアムオスラー卿（Sir William Osler）は、“Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability”、という名言を残しています。つまり、医学、医療、というのは不確実性の科学であり確率論でもって対処する術である、ということです。このことは、医療において明確にこうだといえるものはないということであり常に不確実性がつきまということを示唆しています。だから、医学研究や医療の臨床に携わる者は皆この教えを肝に銘じていなければなりません。この教えは、２００４年のテレビドラマ、白い巨塔（山崎豊子原作）、において大河内病理学教授が里見第一内科助教授に言った、“里見君、医療に絶対はない、だから医者は悩み続けなければならない。君の苦悩を、私は支持するよ”、という言葉にも反映されていると思えます。

医療において、偶然なのか必然なのかということだけでなく何事も明確にしたいという願望は理解できます。しかし、ここには対極的思考、二元論的思考、がもたらしかねない問題が潜んでいます。もし、この問題に陥れば、“なんでこんなことになったのだ！そうならないって言ってたじゃないか‘、というような結末になることがあるからです。

先ず、何事も明確に判別したいという願望への注意として、この明確の分別が偶然か必然かということに絞ってみましょう。

実は、個々の現象について偶然なのか、必然なのか、議論することはヘーゲルや九鬼周造の考えに照らし合わせれば不毛だといえます。なぜならば、ヘーゲルも九鬼も必然と偶然は対極的なものではないととらえているからです。特に、ヘーゲルはWissenschaft der Logik（科学の論理学）において、瞬時では偶然であっても、これらの偶然は必然へとつながるものだ、と論じています。ちょっと考えを飛躍させて連続性のある変化し続ける事象を関数に例えるなら、その関数を微分したもの、つまり、個々の微分値は偶然のようなものであり、その関数を積分していくとそれぞれの偶然を通して何等かの必然性が浮かび上がるとイメージできるのではないでしょうか。高校の数学で微分と積分は切り離すことはできないということを覚えているでしょうか？これと同様、偶然と必然は対極的に切り離せないものなのです。だから、ある特定の一つの事象がそれが偶然なのか必然なのか、その時点では確実にわからないわけです。ある確実性をもって偶然か必然か議論するのであれば、積分的、大局的、な視点でその事象がどう変化していくのかを追っていかねばなりません。だからオスラーは前述したように論じたのだと思います。

オスラーは医療における不確実性にどう臨床的に対応するかについて確率論をうまく活用できる技を磨けというように医学生や医師達に教えました。この教えは医師に限ったものではなく、臨床に携わる者すべてにいえるものです。私のようなカウンセリング心理学や臨床牧会神学を専門とする者にとってもです。

それではここから、確率論でもって偶然と必然について考えてみましょう。

不確実性の普遍的存在は統計学を履修した方ならよくお分かりだと思います。なぜならば、１００％の信頼区間（０％の偶然性）を持つデータエビデンス、つまり、１００％の確証でもって仮説を指示できるだけのエビデンスがあるということは現実的にあり得ないからです。

私が専門の一つとする行動科学の代表的なものである心理学の研究ではその統計的データは一般的に９５％の信頼区間、つまり、５％の有意水準、でもって”正しいといえる“としますが、医学や薬学においてはこの基準が更に厳しく、９９％以上の信頼区間、つまり１％以下の有意水準、にされていることもあります。とはいえ、研究結果がまったくの０％の確率でもってそれが偶然性によるものだと明示できる、つまり、０％の有意水準、１００％の信頼区間、でもって議論できるものは自然科学にせよ社会科学にせよ、行動科学にせよ、科学研究の現実においてありません。それ故、科学というパラダイムにおいて、エビデンスの過信は危険をはらみ、そもそも、科学で完全に証明できるものなんぞ何もないからです。科学によってわかることはすべて確率論的に認識できる事実であって、単に、確率的な“多数意見”といっていいでしょう。それを数値化した指標が信頼区間です。よって、科学で”確実、あるいは、必然的、と示されることは常に、その時点では認識できない何らかの不確実性をはらんでいるのです。統計学では、その度合いが有意水準という指標なのです。

ザックリ言うならば、科学の眼で見える現象は単に信頼区間の確率的な必然であって、常に、有意水準の確率的な偶然によるものかもしれないということです。言い換えれば、科学において１００％の必然性はないということです。だから、科学的エビデンスに基付く現在の医療において、前述したオスラーの教えは大切なのです。

例えば、たばこを吸うと肺がんになるという議論について考えてみると、現実的にみて、喫煙者すべてが肺がんになると１００％の確証でもっていえません。しかし、確かに、喫煙は肺がんのリスクとなることは、喫煙と肺がんの相関性を回帰分析で示せば明確にあぶりだせます。ただ、この相関性のうちどれ具合の確率で喫煙と肺がんの因果関係で占められているのかはケースバイケースだといえるでしょう。

だから、急に具合が悪くなる、という現象もある程度の必然性とある程度の偶然性を同時に持っており、それらがどれぐらいの確率を占めているのか、その人の体質、既往症、時と場合、などの様々な因子によって変わってくるのだといえます。これは、シュレディンガーの猫の実験からいえる量子力学にある重ね合わせの確率的理論のようなニュアンスがあると思います。放射性元素が既に崩壊しているという確率とまだそうでないという確率が同時に重ね合わせに存在していることを、箱の中の猫は死んでいる確率と生きている確率を重ね合わせており、実際に生きているのかしんでいるのかは、一定時間後に箱をあけてみないとわからないというものです。

人間誰でもその約３７兆個もの細胞のうち毎日数千個が突然変異しがん化する方向へ向かっていると言われています。しかし、免疫機能によってこうした異常細胞は取り除かれ、これらが集まってがんの病巣をつくるまで至らないわけです。しかし、実際、異常細胞の増殖が免疫による処理能力を超えれば、がん化することになってしまいます。

人間の体はシュレーディンガーの猫を入れた箱のようなものです。外から見て、箱の中の猫が生きているか、箱の中に仕掛けられた放射性物資の崩壊によるエネルギーで毒ガスが箱の中に入れこまれ猫が死んでいるのか、わかりません。だから、実際に箱を開けてみるまでは、猫が生きている確率と死んでいる確率は重ね合わせであると議論します。人間の体も外からではがんが存在する確率そうでない確率が重ね合わさっており、その時その時、この重ね合わせの確率が連続的に変化するものだと考えられます。外から見ただけでは、がんなのかそうでないのか”線引き“、つまり、区別がつきません。分子生物学的に、前者が後者を上回れば、体内でがんが成長しはじめやがて様々な症状をひきおこし、体を開けてみなくてもわかるようになってきます。

ただ、何らかの持病や既往症があれば急に具合が悪くなる確率がそうでない人より高くなると想定され、その必然性の確率も偶然性に比べて高いこともあるかもしれません。それ以外のことは科学的に解明できないといえると思います。

それでは、偶然と必然は重ね合わせで存在するのでしょうか？

九鬼周造の”偶然性の問題“によれば、シュレーディンガーが示す重ね合わせの量子力学理論のように、あり得るといえます。九鬼周造は偶然と必然は表裏一体だととらえているからです。ただ、厳密に言えば、シュレーディンガーの量子力学的な重ね合わせは表裏一体と必ずしも同じだと言えませんが。とはいえ、前述したように微分と積分がそうであるように、偶然と必然は切り離せないのでこれらが重ね合わせのようであり、また、表裏一体的に共存していると言えるでしょう。それ故、偶然は必然となり得、また、その逆も然り。ここが宮野さんの大きな研究テーマの九鬼哲学にある偶然性の問題の面白さだといえましょう。

しかし、そうだからこそでしょうか、宮野さんも磯野さんも医療の現場での様々な臨床事象をただ数値化し確率論で議論することで線引き分別することに異議を申し立てています。これは、オスラーが説く、医療とは確率論で対処するという教えについて、どう確率論で対処すべきかを示唆してくれるのではないでしょうか。お二人の現在の医療に対するこの批判は、確率論の間違った応用だといえます。私が思うには、宮野さんと磯野さんは確率論を医療における線引き選別の道具として使うなと主張されていると思います。また、お二人は社会における線引きによる様々な問題を指摘しています。

必然と偶然ははっきりと境界線を引いて分別できるものではありません。なぜならば、これらは重ね合わせ的、表裏一体的に常に共存するものであるからです。また、宮野さんと磯野さんが提議する医療における確率の扱いは、オスラーが説くことへの量子力学の重ね合わせ理論にも通ずる最適な答えであるといえます。

つまり、急に具合が悪くなるということは、明確に判別できない偶然と必然の確率的な表裏一体的とも考えられる重ね合わせであるといえるのではないでしょうか。

だから医学部の入試には必ず確率統計と量子力学の問題を盛り込むべきですね。

因みに、私が落ちた”浪速大学”医学部の物理の入試問題に放射性元素が一定の時間内に崩壊した際に放出された放射線エネルギー、つまり、放射能、の総量を求めよという問題がありました。対数関数の積分だということは分かるのですぐに式をたてて計算しはじめたのですが、途中で、数が何か変に複雑になってきたので見直してみたら計算間違いをしていたことに気付き、速攻で訂正にかかったのですが、試験終了のベルが鳴ってしまいました。そうでなければ、私は医師になっていたかもしれません。しかし、現在この確率は０ですね。医師になる確率と医師にならない確率が重ね合わせで存在していたのはこの量子力学的な物理の問題で致命的な失敗をするまででした。しかし確率をベースとする統計学に関しては、高校、大学、大学院、一貫してよくできたのではないかと思いますが。

”かもしれない”という理不尽な偶然を理に適った必然に変えていく生き方 －哲学者、宮野真生子さんの生き方から学ぶ

 冒頭から私事で恐縮ですが、還暦を迎えたからであろうか、最近、自分は死ぬかもしれない、という思いに駆られることが多い気がします。実は、今までもそうだったけど若さや忙しさのあまりそんなことに気にかけずに突っ走るように生きてきただけかもしれません。別に、還暦だから若い頃に比べ暇なことが多いというわけでもないですし。私のような出生コースから外れた落ちこぼれフーテン同様貧乏暇なしにとって定年退職という贅沢はありません。死ぬまで働いていかないと生きていけないからです。だから、若い頃と同じように生きることに精一杯ですが、なぜか、死ぬかもしれないう感にとらわれがちになる気がするようになったのです。

”死ぬかもしれない“と思い、感じていると、私の体を構成する約３７兆個もの細胞はそれらの染色体の先端にある分裂再生の為の”回数券“ともいえるテロメアがあとどれくらい残っているのだろう、なんて昔習った生物学を回顧しながら思うこともあります。人間の脳とはこうしたいたずらをするので”死ぬかもしれない“という感じはそう簡単に忙しさで覆いかぶせたりすることはできないようです。

確かに、６０歳ともなれば、確率的に死ぬ可能性は２５歳の頃に比して高くなることは必然だといえます。正直いって、すでに私の体ではガタがきている部分があります。だから、“やばい！故障しているかもしれない”と感じ、ここからの連動で、“死ぬかもしれない”に行きつく前に、“障害をもつようになり介護を要するようになるかもしれない”、“でもお金がないから介護なんて受けられないから苦悩のうちに死ぬかもしれない”、などと脳がどんどん負の連鎖のメッセージを送ってきます。このままだとストレスとなり血中コルチゾールが慢性的に高くなり、本当に心身ともに故障する確率をあげてしまいます。

では、どうすればいいのか？

ここで思いつくのが森田療法の根幹である不安を“あるがままに受け入れる”ということでそれによる心身的な症状を克服していくという知恵です。

体のあっちこっちが故障して自分らしく生きられず介護が必要になるかもしれない、そして、その先に、死ぬかもしれない、という不安をあるがままに、還暦となればこうしたことは寧ろ不思議なことではないと、受け入れることです。そして、ここで少し認知行動療法的に、受け入れた不安にたいする認識を別の視点からしてみることです。　例えば、孔子がいうように、６０となれば“耳従う”ことになっているので、加齢によって今まで以上の故障するリスクが高くなった体が故障を予言する兆候を見逃さないようにと、脳が今まで以上に”障害をもつようになるかもしれない“とか“死ぬかもしれない”という感じに駆らせるのだという認識による受け入れです。こうして、寧ろ、心身的にあり得る故障を未然に防ぐ為の警告的なメカニズムによるものだと割り切れば、死ぬかもしれないと感じるのは納得がいき、今まで以上に体からの声に耳を従わせようと思います。

実は、この“かもしれない”という感覚がもたらす不安については、哲学者、宮野真生子さん、と文化人類学者、磯野真穂さん、のメール書簡のやりとりを編集した、“急に具合が悪くなる”という本から学びえるものがあります。

メールを磯野さんに打っていた頃の宮野さんは乳がんと闘病中でした。がんと戦いながら大学で哲学を講じ学生達の研究を指導し、また、講演活動なども活発にされていました。こうして、がんと格闘しながら精力的に生きておられた宮野さんはある会合で文化人類学者の磯野さんと出会い、腹心の仲といえる友情でむすばれました。だから、いろいろなことを本音であるがままに言えるのです。この本にあるお二人のメールを読めばわかります。

磯野さんと出会った頃の宮野さんは、今の医療はかなり進歩しているのだから自分もがんを多くの患者のように克服できるという確信と希望を持っておらたようです。しかし、宮野さんのがんは着実に悪化していき転移してしまい、ある日、医師から“急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない”と言われました。これは、その頃の宮野さんのがんの状態を鑑みてのことで、毎日精力的に活動されている時に医師が発した警告なのです。

こうした医師の警告をうけて、宮野さんには選択肢がありました。急に具合が悪くなるかもしれないから、約束したことであってもこの講演会はキャンセルしたほうがいい、という選択。いや、そうだからといって急に具合が悪くならない可能性もあるのでこっちに賭けてみよう、といって講演会に行き、予定通り精力的に講演するという選択。

この本にある宮野さんと磯野さんのメールのやりとりの軌跡からもわかりますが、宮野さんは出会い、そして、そこから生まれる人間関係をとても大切にする方です。また、宮野さんは研究や学生教育だけでなく一般市民への啓蒙活動にも非常に情熱的な方で、講義でも講演でも、予定されていることを”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“からといってキャンセルできるでしょうか？

”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“、というのはある程度の確率をもった警告であり、宣告ではありません。本人がそれを自覚するかしないか、といった主観的なことに関わらず、客観的にみて何事にも一定の確率のリスクというものがあります。宮野さんはこうしたことを踏まえて、その時その時、自分は生きているんだ、今、自分はこの講義をする為に生きているんだ、今自分はこの講演をする為に生きているんだ、今自分は学生達やお集まりいただいた皆様と交流するために生きているんだ、として認識されていたと思います。これはまさに生きがいの実感ですね。生きがいがあるからこそ、”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“というリスクがあっても情熱的にその時その時を生き抜いておられたのだと思います。

人間は、“急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない”と医師に言われたら、もし“そうだったらどうしよう”と不安に感じます。神経学的にみて、人間が不安を感じるのはごく自然なことであり、それは長い進化の過程で恐竜や野獣のような外敵から身を守る為のアラームとして得たものです。解剖学的には、進化上、”古い脳“ともいわれる大脳辺縁帯にある偏桃体の働きによるものです。だから、人間の脳が偏桃体を持つ限り、私達は不安と向き合い続けなければなりません。しかし、この生物学的、心理学的、事実を必然として、森田療法の基本理論にあるように、あるがままに受け入れ、認知行動療法的に不安に対する認識を建設的なものへとすることで、不安によって人生の質を損なうことなく精一杯生き続けることができるのです。これは、”新しい脳“ともいわれる大脳皮質にある前頭葉、とりわけ、前頭前野、を活発に働かせることでなし得るのです。ここでは、大脳辺縁帯から送られてくる、不安を含めた、様々な感情を客観的、論理的、に処理、統制、することができるからです。だから、”かもしれない“という不安アラームが鳴ったからといって不安に翻弄されることなく、生活の質を崩すことなく行動していける意思決定ができるのです。それ故、たとえ、”かもしれない“という感じの原因、例えば、宮野さんの場合、がんの予期してなかった悪化による”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“、が理不尽であると感じても、前頭前野でうまく処理することで、より一層精一杯生きて行く力という理に適うものへと変えていくことができるわけです。宮野さんが特に情熱的に研究されていた哲学者、九鬼周造さんの考えに沿っていうならば、これは、”かもしれない“と感じさせる事象が偶然と思われていても、前頭前野でその認識を変えれば建設的な必然とすることができるといえます。このことは人間がその”新しい脳“故に人間らしく生きていける、ということを示すいい例ですね。これは不安は厄介者というよりも人間が人間らしく生きて行く力となる、という五木寛之さんの主張にも反映されているといえます。

“急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない”という医師からの警告への宮野さんの対応は、まさにこの理不尽な偶然を理に適った必然と認識し直すことで、不安に振り回されることなく情熱的に生き抜いていくことがでることを証明するものだと考えられます。勿論、これは”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“という医師の警告に対する無頓着な反応ではありません。これは前頭前野で総合的かつ客観的に情報処理された結果なのでこの医学的な警告が意味するリスクを考慮した上でのことです。こうした意志決断によって行動されたからこそ、宮野さんは”急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない“けれど、それによって生きることの質を損なわずに自分らしく精一杯活動を続けることができたのだといえます。不安によって人生の質を低下させるのではない、という以上に、寧ろ、不安をあるがままに受け入れ、受け入れた不安という現実に対する認識を建設的なものへと変えることで、不安をそれまで以上に精一杯情熱的に生きていこうとされたところに、宮野さんの生き方から学ぶところがあるのではないでしょうか。

医師からそう言われようがどうであれ、人間誰でも何かの機会に、理不尽にも偶然にも、“急に具合が悪くなるかもしれない”、いや、”死ぬかもしれない“と感じ不安に駆られることあるものです。これは、進化に照らし合わせ、脳神経学上、心理学上、人間が人間であるが故の必然だといえます。そして、これを”新しい脳“の目玉ともいえる前頭前野で、森田療法的、認知行動療法的、に処理することで、より人間らしく人生の質を更に高めるように生き抜いていくことができるわけです。宮野さんのがんと向き合う生き方はこれを証明してくれているのです。

Jesus Brings the Divine Mercy Through His Passion, Death, and Resurrection

Octave Sunday of Paschaltide, the Sunday after the Resurrection Sunday, is called the Divine Mercy Sunday, because it was Jesus’ expressed desire for his Church to solemnly cerebrate the Divine Mercy. He appeared and said to St. Maria Faustina Kowalska, in 1934:

I desire that the first Sunday after Easter be the Feast of Mercy (Diary of St. Faustina, 299).

In 1936, Jesus said to St. Faustina further more on the Divine Mercy Sunday:

I desire that the Feast of Mercy be a refuge and shelter for all souls, and especially for poor sinners. On that day the very depths of My tender mercy are open. I pour out a whole ocean of graces upon those souls who approach the fount of My mercy. The soul that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion shall obtain complete forgiveness of sins and punishment. On that day all the divine floodgates through which grace flow are opened. Let no soul fear to draw near to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet. My mercy is so great that no mind, be it of man or of angel, will be able to fathom it throughout all eternity. Everything that exists has come forth from the very depths of My most tender mercy. Every soul in its relation to Me will contemplate My love and mercy throughout eternity. The Feast of Mercy emerged from My very depths of tenderness. It is My desire that it be solemnly celebrated on the first Sunday after Easter. Mankind will not have peace until it turns to the Fount of My Mercy (ibid. 699).

On this Sunday, the risen Jesus invites us to his tender mercy, the Divine Mercy, as he did to his disciples on the night of his resurrection and to skeptical Thomas on the night of the Sunday after the resurrection Sunday, as described in the Gospel Reading (John 20:19-31). In appearing to the disciples, the risen Jesus did not ask the disciples why they ran away from him, abandoning him, upon his arrest on the night before his death after his agonizing prayer in Gethsemane (e.g. Matthew 26:50; cf. 26:31; cf. Zechariah 13:7; John 16:32). He did confront and address their weak faith and compromised loyalty. Rather, he offered peace twice (John 20:19). But as to remind of their sin – the sin of the world, which condemned him, the risen Jesus showed his hands, where nail marks were (John 20:25), and his side, where a deep wound of Roman soldier’s lance (John 19:34) (John 20:20a). Of course, showing his wounds in his risen body was not to press on the disciples’ guilt but to show that his resurrection was a reality. So they rejoiced, seeing the real Jesus being risen (John 20:20b). This is, indeed, how the Divine Mercy began to manifest through the risen Jesus and how it turned the disciples’ fear and doubt into peace and joy. Being the embodiment of the Divine Mercy, the peace that the rise Jesus offered was the peace that he had promised during the Lord’s Supper, instituting the Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist:

Peace I leave you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid (John 14:27).

The risen Jesus offered his peace not just once but twice on the night of the day of his resurrection. When he offered peace for the second time, he was indicating the disciples’ apostolic mission upon receiving the Holy Spirit on Pentecost. So the rise Jesus said:

Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you (John 20:21).

Then he poured his breath upon the disciples (John 20:22) and said:

Receive the Holy Spirit. Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and whose sin you retain are retained (John 20:23).

With the second offering of his peace, the risen Jesus poured the Holy Spirit through his gentle breath on the disciples to signal the coming of the powerful Holy Spirit on Pentecost (acts 2:1-4), after his ascension into heaven (Acts 1:6-9).. This reflects Jesus’ discourse on the Holy Spirit as another Parakletos during the Lord’s Supper on the night before his death (John 14:16-20, 26: 15:26-27; 16:5-16). Therefore, the risen Jesus’ offering of the Holy Spirit through his breath, along with his peace, to the disciples on that night was to foretell the disciples of their commissioning (Matthew 28:19-20//Mark 16:14-18; Luke 24:44-49).

It is also important to note that the risen Jesus also established the Sacrament of Reconciliation by giving the disciples the authority to forgive sins on his behalf, upon offering the Holy Spirit and peace (John 20:23).

In the first part of the Gospel Reading (John 20:19-23), we see the Divine Mercy manifested through the risen Jesus in his appearance to the disciples, who were hiding in fear, on the night of the day of his resurrection, and how the Divine Mercy was offered to them – through his peace and the Holy Spirit. Then, this Gospel narrative also describe how the Divine Mercy transformed not only the disciples fear and doubt into peace and joy but directed the disci0les’ life into a new one by foretelling of their apostolic commission and giving them the authority to administer the Sacrament of Reconciliation – to be sent out not only to testify the Divine Mercy but also to practice the Divine Mercy through their apostolic pastoral ministries, including taking care of sinners through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. 

The second part of the Gospel Reading (John 2:24-31) features how the Divine Mercy of the risen Jesus transformed skeptical Thomas into a disciple of firm faith (vv.24-29). Though he knew that Thomas would not believe without inspecting physical evidence of the resurrection by himself, Jesus did not rebuke him. Instead, he let Thomas do what he would need to believe – letting him use his finger and hands to examine the wound marks of Jesus’ risen body, to encourage him to believe (John 20:27). Then, Thomas immediately believed, saying, “My Lord and my God!”(John 20:28). This gives an example of how the Divine Mercy turns even stubborn doubt into strong belief. And the Divine Mercy allows the skeptics to examine thoroughly, if it is necessary for them to believe. The Divine Mercy does not criticize those who demand empirical evidence to believe. However, Jesus reminds that physical evidence is not necessary to believe. So he said to Thomas:

Have you come to believe because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and have believed (John 20:29). 

In the context of the Divine Mercy, this statement of the rise Jesus was not to say that Thomas was less blessed because he needed empirical evidence to believe. Rather, it is to encourage him to strive for being able to believe even without tangible evidence so that he would be more blessed. 

The above words of Jesus to Thomas about believing without seeing physical evidence (John 20:29) is a sign of a new life as a result of being benefitted from the Divine Mercy, according to the Second Reading (1 Peter 1:3-9). In this reading, Peter describes that the blessed God gives a new life to a living hope in His great mercy, namely the Divine Mercy through the resurrection of Jesus, the Son (1 Peter 1:3). A living hope is essential to believe – to have faith. In fact, faith (believing) is defined in relation to hope in this sentence:

Faith is the realization of what is hoped for and evidence of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1).

It is not just hope but a living hope that matters, because it is what the Divine Mercy brings upon the resurrection of Jesus. Indeed, the Divine Mercy is also associated with the Holy Spirit to augment our hope as a living hope to fortify our faith. So Paul wrote:

For in hope we were saved. Now hope that sees for itself is not hope. For who hopes for what one sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait with endurance. In the same way, the Spirit too comes to the aid of our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit itself intercedes with inexpressible groanings. And the one who searches hearts knows what is the intention of the Spirit, because it intercedes for the holy ones according to God’s will (Romans 8:24-27).

As the Divine Mercy manifests with peace and the Holy Spirit (i.e. John 20:21-22), we can pray for the Holy Spirit to intercede for us to overcome our weakness in faith because our hope is too weak to believe without evidence. This way, we can endure our groanings with a living hope. 

What the Divine Mercy that comes upon Jesus’ resurrection brings is not only a new life of a living hope for eschatological salvation but to the imperishable and everlasting heavenly inheritance, safeguarded by the power of God and through our faith (1 Peter 1:4-6).  So we can rejoice over such benefits of the Divine Mercy through hope and faith even though we may have to endure trials to refine our faith’s genuiness for praise, honor, and glory of Jesus’ return at the eschaton (1 Peter 1:7-8). This shall lead us to salvation of our souls as we become able to believe and love Jesus even we do not see him in our naked eyes with an indescribable and glorious joy (1 Peter 1:8-9).

Now we know how the Divine Mercy can strengthen our faith in Jesus, hope for his Parousia to us, and our love for him, with joy, through peace, empowered by the Holy Spirit! 

The holy catholic (universal) apostolic Church was conceived on the night before his death by Jesus with his new commandment to love one another as he has loved (John 13:34), demonstrated by him washing the disciples’ feet (John 13:13-17), and with the institution of the Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist (e.g. Luke 22:14-21). The Church before the resurrection was in her embryonic form. Then, it was transformed into a fetus form on the night of Jesus’ resurrection with the Divine Mercy, as the risen Jesus offered his peace and the Holy Spirit in his gentle breath to her, telling her to be sent out as the Father has sent him, and instituting the Sacrament of Reconciliation by giving the disciples the authority to forgive sins (John 20:19-23). This fetus form of the Church is to be born with the powerful Holy Spirit on Pentecost to give testimony of the Divine Mercy, serving as a refuge and a shelter of souls, especially for poor sinners. Indeed, the Church being a vehicle of the Divine Mercy on earth means serving as a field hospital for souls wounded by sins, as in Pope Francis’ ecclesiological view, and as a dispenser of the medicine of mercy, as Pope St. John XXIII described. 

In the First Reading (Acts 2:42-47), we see how the nascent Church was as a community fully endowed with the Divine Mercy. It was where everyone was devoted to Jesus’ teaching, passed on by the apostles and to a communal life of sharing bread by breaking it. Not to mention, they were all devoted to prayers and praising God with sincerity of their hearts.  In this newborn Church upon Pentecost, everyone is willing to share what they had with others. There was no one to act egocentrically. Thus, there was peace, harmony, and joy, giving thanks to God for His mercy. And this is well-reflected in the refrain of the Responsorial Psalm: 

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, and His love is everlasting (Psalm 118:1).

Here, His love is chesed in Hebrew. It also means mercy. There is another Hebrew word for mercy, rachem, derived from rechem, which means a womb. Compared to rachem, chesed as mercy refers to steadfast mercy, while rachem has more emotional connotation, as it often refers to compassionate mercy. By singing the above refrain, we acknowledge the Divine Mercy to be steadfast, therefore, it is everlasting. And we are so blessed to be beneficiaries of the Divine Mercy as the Church.  At the same time, we, as the Church, are ambassador of the Divine Mercy, taking care of souls wounded with sins, prescribing and dispensing the medicine of mercy, in a field hospital on the battle ground, as we fight against evil in the world. 

The Resurrection of the Incarnated Christ: Paschal Victory for Us to Do God’s Will on Mission

Christus resurrexit! Alleluiah! Christ is risen! Alleluia! 

This is the day that the Lord has made, let us be glad and rejoice in it! (Psalm 118:24)

This is the refrain of the Paschal Sunday responsorial Psalm to express our Paschal joy. 

Paschal Sunday is to celebrate the triumph of Christ, who sacrificed himself as Paschal Lamb, over death. So more words of this victory Psalm, Psalm 118, are sung:

The joyful shout of deliverance is heard in the tents of the righteous: “The Lord’s right hand works valiantly; the Lord’s right hand is raised; the Lord’s right hand works valiantly.” I shall not die but live and declare the deeds of the Lord (Psalm 118:15-17, vv 16-17 are sung for Paschal Sunday Mass)

The right hand of the Lord (Psalm 118:15-16) symbolizes the immeasurably mighty power of the Lord (cf. Isaiah 52: 10).  The Lord’s right hand is also known as His holy hand and sung as His victory in another Psalm:

Sing a new song to the Lord, for he has done marvelous deeds. His right hand and holy arm have won the victory. The Lord has made his victory known; has revealed his triumph in the sight of the nations, He has remembered his mercy and faithfulness toward the house of Israel. All the ends of the earth have seen the victory of our God (Psalm 98:1-3, sung on the 6th Sunday of Paschaltide, Cycle B)

The Resurrection of the incarnated Christ, Jesus, on the third day from his death on the Cross, is the Paschal victory (i.e. Acts 2:24; 1 Corinthians 15:50-58; 2 Timothy 1:10; cf. Revelation 5:5-13). It shows the power of the right and holy arm of God Almighty (אֵל שַׁדַּי, El Shaddai). As reflected in Paschal proclamation, also known as the Exultet, this is what God’s constant salvific work throughout history has culminated. And the seven Old Testament readings (Genesis 1:1-2:2; Genesis 22:1-18; Genesis 22:1-18; Exodus 14:15-15:1; Isaiah 54:5-14; Isaiah 54:5-14; Isaiah 55:1-11; Baruch 3:9-15, 32-4:4; Ezekiel 36:16-17a, 18-28)  of Paschal Vigil Mass reflect how God has been working for us and our salvation ever since the Creation out of His חסד “chesed”, steadfast love. Thus, together with Exultet, these seven readings, are juxtaposable to Pesach Haggadah, as it recalls and retells how God delivered His people from slavery in Egypt, through Passover and crossing the Red Sea, In this sense, Paschal Vigil Mass is a grand celebration of how God’s salvific power has manifested through the incarnated Son, the Christ, as the victorious Paschal Lamb, fulfilling the prophesy in the fourth servant song (Isaiah 52:13-53:12). Indeed, Paschal Vigil Mass is Christian Pesach (Passover). 

As Passover cannot be observed and the Israelites could have not been saved without slaughtering an unblemished lamb as korban Pesach (Exodus 12:3-14), Jesus, the incarnated Christ the Son of God, died on the Cross as the Passover Lamb of God (i.e. John 1:29; 19:14-42), so that his previous blood, the new covenant, can save us. The resurrection, therefore, validates (i.e. 1 Corinthians15:12-19) the saving power of his blood (i.e. 1 Peter 1:18-19). And through his blood, we have become beneficiaries of the new eternal covenant (Luke 22:20; 1 Corinthians 11:25; cf. Jeremiahs 31:31-34). 

Upon the establishment of the New Covenant through the blood of Christ shed on the Cross, confirmed and validated with his Resurrection, not only we are saved but called to do God’s will. So it is written:

May the God of peace, who brought up from the dead the great shepherd of the sheep by the blood of the eternal covenant, Jesus our Lord, furnish you with all that is good, that you may do his will. May he carry out in you what is pleasing to him through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen (Hebrews 13:20-21). 

Christ the risen Paschal Lamb is, indeed, the great shepherd (Hebrews 13:20), the Good Shepherd (John 10:11, 14), who is now leading us to Galilee (Matthew 28:10; cf. 26:32) in order to complete the preparation for our apostolic commission to do God’s will (i.e. Matthew 28:18-20). Of course, to us, Galilee is not the geographical Galilee but the basics of Christ’s teaching, as it is where he began (Matthew 4:12-25). Then, we will receive the Holy Spirit in Jerusalem on Pentecost (Acts 1:4-11; 2:1-13; cf. John 14:15-31; 16:5-16) to conclude Paschaltide, after the risen Christ ascends into heaven from the Mount of Olives (i.e. Luke 24:50-53; cf. 19:29).  Here, as Galilee is so, Jerusalem and the Mount of Olives are figurative. It means that we go back to Galilee, where Jesus laid the foundation of his salvific ministry, bringing it to Jerusalem, before walking to Calvary to offer up himself on the Cross as the Paschal Lamb. When we move from Galilee to Jerusalem with the risen Christ, he will commission us before his ascension on the Mount Olive. Then, we will stay in Jerusalem until the Holy Spirit descends upon us. As we make this post-Resurrection journey with the risen Christ from Galilee to Jerusalem for the first 40 days of Paschaltide, we go over his teaching to make sure we understand, as the two disciples did when they walked to Emmaus with the risen Christ (Luke 24:13-32). With firm understanding of Christ and his teaching, we are ready to send him off to the Father in heaven and receive the powerful Holy Spirit be sent.

Now withthe  Paschal Victory, we return to Galilee with the risen Christ and journey to Jerusalem through Paschaltide to be ready for Pentecost, so that we will do the will of God on our respective apostolic missions with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. 

From Eden to Golgotha: Evolution of the Original Sin and the Death of Jesus on the Cross

We commemorate the death of Jesus, the incarnated Christ, on Friday of the Passion of the Lord, also known as, “Good Friday”. It is the Friday of Holy Week.  It is the day when Jesus goes through progressively increasing agonies and excruciating pain to death on the Cross. It is the day when we, the faithful, also walk with Christ on the road to Calvary (Golgotha), so that, as Paul has (Galatians 2:20), we are crucified with Christ, like the penitent crucified criminal, also known as “the good thief” , who said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom”(Luke 23:42), so that we no longer live an ego-centric life but live a Christ-centric life, a life by faith, as Christ lives in us. 

Crucifixion was a method of execution given to most despicable non-Roman citizen criminal under the Roman law. And it is how Jesus was condemned. Gospel passion narratives (Matthew 26:36-27:61//Mark 14:43-15:47//Luke 22:47-23:56; John 18:1-19:42)  describe not only how Jesus endured beatings but also insults. Those who were expressively contemptuous to Jesus were those who demanded Roman governor, Pontius Pilate, to crucify him, even though Pilate found no reason to be executed (John 19:38; 19:6b). And they were those who enthusiastically welcomed him , shouting, “Hosanna to the Son of David!”(Matthew 27:9), thinking that he was the Messianic Davidic King, who was prophesized to triumphantly enter Jerusalem by riding on a donkey (Zechariah 9:9), coming from the Mount of Olives, east of Jerusalem (Matthew 21:1; Ezekiel 43:2), on the first day of that week.

So why did these people of Jerusalem change their mind so fast, from fervent acceptance to hostile rejection within short five days? And why did the Pharisees, Scribes, chief priests, and the high priest, wanted kill Jesus obsessively to a point bringing false witnesses to the Sanhedrin to justify their hatred to him (Matthew 26:59-60).

As for the people, it was because Jesus turned out to be the kind of Messiah they had hoped and thought. Jesus did not come to Jerusalem to wage a war against Caesar to fee Israel from the Roman rule to recover Israel’s sovereignty, in restoring the mighty Davidic kingdom. Their bubble of hope was busted and turned into disappointment and resentment. This psychological state was a fertile ground for hatred and hostility to grow. Imagine you found out that what you had hoped for was nothing but a false hope. You would feel betrayed.  So the religious leaders poured highly flammable gas on the drowd's sparks of indignantation toward Jesus, persuading them to let the Roman authorities to execute Jesus (i.e. Matthew 27:20).

Religious leaders, such as the Pharisees, the Scribes, and chief priests, held grudge toward Jesus for a long time. They had an issue with him ever since he healed a paralyzed man on a Sabbath day (John 5:1-46).  Their animosity toward Jesus festered into murderous rancor (John 7:1, 25-32, 44-5; 8:59; 10:31. 39; 11:45-57). By the time Jesus entered Jerusalem on the first day of the week, they were determined to arrest and kill him. Then, Judas Iscariot, one of the twelve disciples, betrayed Jesus and cut a devil’s deal with them for 30 silver coins (Matthew 26:14-16). This enabled them to arrest Jesus (Matthew 26:47-56//Mark 14:43-50//Luke 22:47-53; John 18:1-11).

Once Jesus was held in the blood-thirsty hands of the religious leaders, they put him on trial by bringing false witnesses against him to justify their murderous desire by charging him with blasphemy for all his teaching and signs (Matthew26:57-68//Mark 14:53-65). To justify their evil with the Law, they knew they were violating the Law against a false witness (Exodus 20:16. 23:7). And they sure knew that testifying falsely results in due condemnation (Deuteronomy 19:16-21). Nevertheless, they took the Law in their own evil hands to condemn Jesus. Their murderous desire was so out of control to a point of blinding themselves to the Law. 

So how did these religious leaders grow in blood-thirsty to Jesus even by violating the Law? 

To answer this question, Pilate had an insight on this matter and said it as their envy of Jesus (Matthew 27:18). In other words, out of their envy, their desire to kill Jesus grew. 

According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1866, envy is one of the seven deadly sins, associated with pride, greed, lust, wrath, gluttony, and sloth. These are psychological marks of a ego-centric life. And they certainly had many of these, especially pride and greed for self-glorification, instead of letting God be praised (i.e. Matthew 16:6; 23:5), as well as anger to feed their murderous rage (Matthew 26:65-68//Mark 14:63-64).

Now we see, this set of vices, stemming from ego-centeredness, grown into the seven deadly sins, especially a combination of envy and wrath, is what was driving for the Sanhedrin to conspire Roman governor, Pontius Pilate, to have Jesus crucified. The former knew that there were no legitimate witness against Jesus. The later once declare Jesus innocent. But envy-driven rage, spreading to the crowd, who once welcomed him as their long-waited Messiah-King, put Jesus in excruciating agony into death on the Cross. 

We see how envy, which is a mark of ego-centric life had evolved in murdering Jesus, manipulating the crowd and Pilate. But we find the murder of Abel committed by Abel on the same spectrum, as a consequence of the sin of Cain’s parents, Adam and Eve.

In Eden, the Original  Sin resulted in ego consciousness, and its first symptom was shame (Genesis 3:6-7). So Adam and Eve hid themselves from God (Genesis 3:10). When God found them and confronted, they refused to take responsibility for sin. Adam blamed Eve, and Eve blamed the Tempter, the Satan in the disguise of a serpent, the tempter (Genesis 3:11-13).

The ego-consciousness from the Original Sin resulted in shame that Adam and Eve experienced, prompting them to hide from God. Then, in the first-born son of Adam and Eve, Cain, this manifested as envy of his younger brother Cain, resulting in Cain’s murder of Abel because God favored Abel’s offering but not Cains. (Genesis 4:1-8).

Cain was envy because God did not accept his offering but only Abel’s. The religious leaders were envy of  Jesus because he was gaining far great attention than they did to themselves (i.e. John 12:17-19). Jesus’ increasing popularity certainly hurts them as their ego-centricism and greet for popularity makes Jesus a threat to their egos. So, as Cain killed his younger brother, letting his envy of Abel manifest in murder, they also let their envy of Jesus lead to killing him.

Now we can see how the Original Sin in Eden has evolved in the killing of Jesus in Golgotha. 

In order to lean a critical lesion from how Jesus was put to death on that Friday, we must guard ourselves against these seven deadly sins. We cannot reduce the death of Jesus to our salvation. In fact, though we are saved by his innocent blood flew from his body on the Cross, we may not be fully redeemed in his Kingdom when he returns to judge us unless we overcome our ego-centric tendency to fall to these seven deadly sins.

Behold Jesus on the Cross and guard ourselves from envy and all other vices, resulting from our ego-centric disposition, which is a stain of the Original Sin.  This way, we will not crucify him again.  For this, we must crucify ourselves with Jesus for a new life, centered in him. This is reflected on our Paschal hope! 

The Conception of the Living Church at the Lord's Supper

On the first day of the week, the incarnated Christ, Jesus, entered Jerusalem from the city’s east side, coming through the Mount Olives, riding on a donkey. His entry was triumphant as the daughters of Zion enthusiastically welcomed him, shouting, "Hosana to the Son of David!" and waving palm branches, spreading cloaks on his path. Christ entered Jerusalem as the Messianic Davidic King to consumate his salvific ministry on earth to enter the passion and to die and to resurrect, besore returning to the Father, so that the Holy Spirit would be sent to let the Church be born. However, the crowd thought that he came to Jerusalem to liberate Israel from the heavy Roman yokes, a king to defeat Caesar. 

On Thursday of the week, the living Church was conceived in the hearts of the disciples by Christ’s love for them during the Lord’s Supper on the night before his death. As he washed the disciples’ feet, Christ planted the seed of his Church in each disciple. By commanding them to love one another as he had loved, Christ intended his living Church to build his Kingdom on earth with love he gave them, It is love of humble service, as demonstrated by Christ washing the disciples’ feet. 

At the supper, Christ established the Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist with bread and wine, offering his body, blood, soul, and divinity. He reminded that his blood is the New Covenant. Under the New Covenant, unlike the Old Covenant, it was the incarnated Christ’s self-sacrifice once for all, instead of sacrificing animals year after year to remember Passover and to atone our sins with God on Yom Kippur.  

Following the supper, Christ spoke of his departure from this world, referring to his ascension in heaven to return to the Father. He also promised the Holy Spirit to be sent as another Parakletos, while he is the Parakletos. This way, he assured that he would not leave the disciples as orphans, because he is always with them, whether he is visible with his body or not. This way, he reminded them that they can remain in him and his love with a metaphor of a vine and its branches.  This, in fact, is a description of the Church to be born with the Holy Spirit on Pentecost, because, as Christ the vine and the disciples the branches are one, the Church is one living body with many parts of Christ, as he is the head. So in his high priestly prayer, Christ prayed for oneness. 

Then, Christ entered the Passion and walked his path to the Cross.

Though his feet was washed and he shared the bread with Christ at the supper, Judas, one of the twelve disciples, betrayed Christ, and helped those who wanted to kill Christ arrest him. These people whom Judas helped were religious leaders, members of the Sanhedrin, finding Christ "offensive" to their "business", because he did works of healing on Sabbath days, raised Lazarus from the dead, and cleansed the Temple, confronting how they had corrupted the house of God. 

Upon arresting Christ, first, they put a false charge of blasphemy on him to justify his death sentence according to the Mosaic Law, though they grossly violated this Law by setting up false whitnesses against him. Then, to let the Roman authority kill Christ, they brought him to the Roman Governor, Pilate, with a false accusation that he claimed himself as king of the Jews, a threat to Caesar and peace of the Roman Empire. But Pilate did not find Christ guilty according to the Roman Law.  Therefore, Pilate was thinking to relase Christ. But these members of the Sanhedrin pursuated the crowd to demand Pilate to erucify Christ. So they did fanatically. These were the same crowd who welcomed Christ on the first day of the week. In the meantime, except John, the rest of the disciples, whom Christ washed their feet and had the supper with, scattered away out of fear of being arrested for their association with Christ.  Even Peter, who once boasted of his loyalty to Christ to death at the supper, denied his association with him three times, when questioned.

Abandoned by his disciples, rejected by the daughters of Zion, Christ was beaten, mocked, forced to carry his heavy Cross, and nailed to it.

This was a prenatal Church's great crisis. 

While on the Cross, he gave his mother, the Blessed Virgin Mary, to the fetus form of the Church, the disciples, as the Mother of the Church.  Upon his expiration, blood and water flew out of his body on the Cross: the blood of the New Covenant and the living water, the Holy Spirit, going through kenosis for the Church to be born. 

On the third day from his death on the Cross, Christ rose, and the powerful Holy Spirit was involved. After 40 days, the resurrected Christ ascended into heaven  from east of Jerusalem. And 10 days later, on Pentecost, the mighty Holy Spirit descended upon the disciples in unity, and thus, the living Church was born! 

In fact, the Bride of Christ was born, as she is the Church, whom Christ the Lamb is to marry, upon his return at eschaton, to live in union in New Jerusalem. The Eucharist will be served until that time in the Church until her nuptial union with Christ in heaven. 

After his resurrection and before his ascension, Christ commanded Peter, the first Pope, to make sure his sheep are taken care by the love he demonstrated and fed with the Eucharist, his body, blood, soul, and divinity, to make sure they are one and make the new exodus to heaven from this world. 

The living Church, Holy catholic apostolic Church, was conceived during the Supper of the Lord on the night before the incarnated Christ's death, out of his love to be propagated and to take care of his sheep, us the faithful, by the Eucharist, as established at the Supper, and other Sacraments. Even before her  birth, the Church experienced betrayal, denial, rejection, and traumatic violence  - aspects of humanity's darkness, manifestations of sins. Nevertheless, the Church was born on Pentecost by the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome the darkness of the humanity with love of Christ so that eternal peace of the Christ's Kingdom will be established on earth.

What happened during Paschal Triduum will impact us all the way to heaven.