There is a bit of parallel between St. Ignatius of Loyola, the founder of the Society of Jesus, also known as, the Jesuits, and Shakamuni (Gautama), who is known as the founder of Buddhism.
Back in the 6th century BC, Shakamuni, a
young prince of a kingdom in northern India, enjoyed a protected luxury life
within the palace. Though he had a full life that everyone could envy, it was
in terms of a material and worldly sense. And Shakamuni began questioning his
life and, at the same time, his interest in the reality outside the palace
walls grew. So, he ventured out of the palace to see the reality outside palace
in a chariot. It was when a dissonance began in him, leading to his disillusionment
of life, as he witnessed aging, disease, and death. His father protected him
from these by keeping him in the palace. But, at age of 29, this young prince
Shakamuni came to realize how life outside the palace was quite different from what
he had thought as a life within the palace. Then, he also witnessed asceticism
and thought that it could hold a key to find an insight into suffering, such as
aging, disease, and death, so that he would be free from it by following a life
path of asceticism. To seek the way to live a life free from suffering,
Shakamuni abandoned his future kingship, family, and comfortable protected life.
For the next 6 years, he lives a strictly ascetic life. However, he realized
that asceticism did not help him find the insight into suffering and the way to
free himself from suffering. He was left in disillusionment and extreme
exhaustion. Then, Sujata, a young milkmaid in a village saw him and fed him
with a bowl of kheer. Shakamuni regained his strength and began meditating
under the bodhi tree and becoming a buddha, awaking to the Dharma truth.
On October 23, 1491, Ignatius (Íñigo López de Loyol)
born to Don Beltrán and Doña Marina of local minor nobility in the Castle of
Loyola, in the Basque region of Spain. He was baptized as Íñigo. In growing up, he developed a strong vision
of romantic chivalry, and lived a life of machismo and womanizing, in pursuing
his glorification in military career. Because of his narcissistic tendency,
Ignatius had little tolerance to disrespect and no tolerance to insult. For
this reason, he was prone to brawl. At that time, nobody would ever have imagined
that this was how a future Saint lived. But, this kind of life took an
unexpected turn on May 20, 1521, at the Battle of Pamplona.
Ignatius was a Spanish soldier with extraordinary
valor, fiercely fighting against the invading French army during the Battle of
Pamplona. Then, a cannon ball shot by the French hit him, resulting in
near-mortal injuries. By grace of God,
Ignatius survived. However, despite multiple surgeries, his legs could not be
fully repaired. This meant that his original dream for having a beautiful noble
woman with a royal lineage as a high-rank military officer was shattered. Ignatius
must have felt: Now what? Now what I am to live for?
During his convalescence, Ignatius spent days, lying
on bed. He really wanted to spend time reading romantic chivalry stories.
However, the only books he could have in the castle were “Life of Christ” and a
book of Saints. Though these were not what he wanted, reading these “boring”
books was still better than simply spending all day watching the ceiling to
Ignatius. However, as he began to read these books, something about Christ and
Saints started resonating within him. At the same time, he just could not give
up on his dream have a beautiful woman of royal nobility, just like a hero in
his favorite romantic chivalry stories. Thus, this resonance turned into
dissonance within him as he had internal “tag-of-war” between his interest in
women and his newly developed interest in the life of Christ and the live. But,
by the time he was recovered from the war injuries, his new interest in Christ
and Saints became dominant over his interest in women. And he even began to
envision himself imitating Saints, like St. Francis of Assisi.
Because of such a vision for himself, imitating
Saints, to follow Christ, Ignatius left his family castle in Loyola to discern
and seek his way to follow Christ as Saints did – as Shakamuni left his palace
to seek a way to free himself from suffering. This act of leaving and
abandoning in order to pursue something of higher value, in Buddhism term, is known
as pabbajja or pravrajya.
At his pabbajja,
Ignatius was firmly resolved to be “all-in-for-Christ” with his destiny in
Jerusalem and to enter a Carthusian monastery upon his return. It was also because
he recognized that God had been calling him to leave his family castle and live
a holy life as Saints did to follow Christ. Thus, as he set himself on this
pilgrimage journey toward Jerusalem, Ignatius also repented his past life of
sins.
As he set off to Jerusalem, Ignatius stopped at the
Shrine of Black Madonna in Montserrat. This is where he pledged himself to
dedicate his life to God and participated in all-night vigil, trading his
prized sword for a beggar’s cloth. Then, he came to Manresa.
In Manresa, Ignatius lived a life of privation, as
to purify himself. While living an ascetic life, he also intensely worked on
penance. However, after some weeks, this kind of way of life began to take a
heavy toll on him. His confessor worried about Ignatius’ health and provided
him with some additional food. This was where Ignatius liked a life like
Shakamuni, a life of privation, asceticism.
It was also when Ignatius began to develop major
depression and withdrew himself to a cave and meditated for 11 months. But
these 11 months in the Manresa cave made a pivotal point in Ignatius’ journey
of conversion.
As Ignatius struggled with depression, he hanged on
to his initial resolve. These 11 months in the cave was extremely painful –
spiritually and mentally. And he had already endured months of physically and
emotionally painful time during his convalescence from war injuries. He even
became suicidal and physically exhausted due to his acetic life style. But, unlike
the case of Shakamuni, no Sujata for Ignatius. In fact, he did not need Sujata
to help him, because he had God. And grace of God led him out of a period of
his spiritual darkness or what St. John of the Cross would call as la noche oscura del alma (the dark night
of the soul) and to an awakening the truth that God is found in all things. For
Ignatius, this is his “buddha” moment, as the word “buddha” means “awakened or
enlightened one”, gaining prajna (wisdom).
So, Ignatius realized that he did not have to withdraw himself to a cave. And
he came out of it to live a holy life actively engaged in the world.
It is also important to note that Ignatius formulated the Spiritual Exercises, which are to help us discern the Holy Spirit and align our hearts’ desire to God’s by paralleling the life of Christ to ours. He kept notes of deep self-introspections during his time in Manresa and these notes were developed into the Spiritual Exercises.
Then, he came to Jerusalem. However, he was sent
home from there by the Franciscans, who were entrusted as custodians of
Christian churches in the Holy Land, when it was hostile to Christians because
the Holy Land was under the rule of the Ottman Empire.
Imagine the disappointment of Ignatius. He made all
the sacrifices and went through all the troubles, bearing lots of suffering, to
come to Jerusalem as his spiritual pilgrimage. But, he was sent home right
away.
Upon returning to Spain, Ignatius found his purpose
in Christ. So, he began teaching. However he was arrested and imprisoned for
teaching without a credential by the inquisition.
This is another blow against Ignatius – after being
sent home from Jerusalem.
Perhaps, his family nobility paid. Ignatius was
released on condition that he would not preach unless he earned the credential.
Ignatius could have said, “Enough is enough! I did
not realize that following Christ would be like that. Everything I did for his
sake resulted in a blow against me. So, I am done with following Christ.” And
he could have reversed his conversion and return to his past life of sin.
But, Ignatius did not choose that way. Instead, he
chose to take a harder way in order to stick to his pledge to dedicate himself
to Christ.
So, he decided to earn the necessary credential to
teach on Christ and sat in class for basic Latin. And he was already 34 and all
of his classmates were about half of his age.
Of course, these students ridiculed and made fun of him. In the past, in
such a situation, Ignatius had no tolerance and easily had his anger flared up
in rage. However, this time, he bore all of these as he swallowed his pride in
himself. And this is evidence of his
conversion in effect.
After enduring the Latin class and cleared the
language requirement, Ignatius enrolled in college and eventually studied at
the University of Paris to become a priest. It was also where he met Francis
Xavier (future St. Francis Xavier) and Peter Farber (future St. Peter Farber).
Francis Xavier also hailed from the Basque region of
Spain, the same region where Ignatius came from. And Francis had a great
ambition to make himself rich by taking advantage of the expansion of Spanish
Empire by trading. However, Ignatius wanted him to work with him as a priest. He
tried and tried to convince Francis to abandon his original plan to become a
rich world trader and to become a priest to work with him for Christ. But
Francis showed no interest to Ignatius’ invitation to live for Christ. So,
Ignatius quoted Jesus’ words to Francis:
What
profit would there be for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? Or
what can one give in exchange for his life? (Matthew 16:26)
Eventually, Francis sublimated his ambition to gain
profit for himself out of the world trading to his ambition to win more souls
for Christ through the world.
If Ignatius and Francis did not meet, there would
not have been St. Francis Xavier, who
did his missionary works in Goa and Japan.
What Ignatius did to Francis was projecting his
conversion on him: Ignatius’ sublimation of his glory seeking for himself into
glory seeking for Christ to prompt Francis’ sublimation of his ambition to make
profit out of world trading to his ambition to win souls from all over the
world for Christ.
Ignatius was an eager seeker of glory and remained
to be this way throughout his entire life. But, through his painful and
transcendental conversion process, the object of his glory-seeking changed from
himself to God, as his self-denial, which can be compared to the goal of
Buddhism, known as anatman or anatta.
In juxtaposing the life of St. Ignatius of Loyola to
the life of Shakamuni Buddha, we can see Ignatius’ conversion journey was also
a process of becoming a “buddha”. But it was not for what the Buddhist calls as
the Dharma but for Christ, as his conversion means becoming fully awakened and
enlightened to the truth that Christ has taught. He came to realize this in
finding God in all things. And a byproduct of his journey to become “buddha”
was his Spiritual Exercises, which is a good example of what David Tracy describes
as “mutually critical correlation” between Christian texts and our own lived
life experience. The Spiritual Exercises
of St. Ignatius of Loyola grew out of his own correlation of his struggles on
his conversion journey to the life of Christ, as written in the Gospels. This
is as guided by God the Holy Spirit.
Now, how can we relate the life of St. Ignatius of
Loyola to his feast day Scripture Readings?
In light of the First Reading (1 Corinthians
10:31-11:1), we can see a general view of how St. Ignatius of Loyola lived a
life for Christ. The way he lived did not bring a grief to the Holy Spirit, as
he constantly discern for the Holy Spirit to stay on the right path in
following Christ, as the Father willed for him. And, to him, following him also
meant to imitate him. Such a life is not for him but for the benefits of many. It
is all “Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam” – for
the greater glory of God.
The Gospel Reading (Luke 14:25-33), on the other
hand, rather zeros in on with the conversion of St. Ignatius of Loyola, upon
recognizing Christ’s calling on him.
As he was reading on the life of Christ and lives of
Saints, Ignatius began to develop his interest in following Christ as Saints
did. But in order to follow Christ, one must fully accept and embrace these
conditions: To love Christ more than anyone else and above all (Luke 14:26) and
To bear suffering and self-sacrifice to the extent of death (Luke 14:27) with
thoroughly thought and careful preparation so that your apostolic discipleship
is fruitful (Luke 14:28-33).
Jesus said to potential followers:
If
any one comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children,
brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple
(Luke 14:26).
Does it mean we have to “hate” ourselves, our
parents, our siblings, our spouses, and our children?
Of course, not.
In this context, the Greek word, μισεῖ/misei, is used hyperbolically to
say that we must love Christ more than anyone else. We love everyone else “less”
as we love Christ “more”.
Unless we love Christ more than anyone else, how
could we carry our cross? (Luke 14:27).
Because we love Christ more than anyone else, we can
carry our cross (Luke 14:26-27), and this is just an absolutely necessary
condition to follow Christ. It means self-denial, comparable to anatta or anatman (resolving ego) in Buddhism, freeing ourselves from our
attachment to our egos. And without
this, we cannot leave or abandon what we used to be attached to in order to
follow Christ. And this is Christian “pabbajja
or pravrajya”.
This is not out of whim or to be carried out on
emotional level. It takes a considerable amount of planning and discernment, as
reflected in the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola. And Jesus uses
two small parables of building and
battle to be successful.
So, Jesus said to reiterate the importance of
detachment or what Buddhism teaches as “nekkhamma”
for “anatta or anatman” and “pabbajja or pravrajya”:
In
the same way, everyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions cannot
be my disciple (Luke 14:33).
God did not want Ignatius to change himself – his nature
to seek glory. What God wanted him to change in his conversion journey was the
object of his glorification seeking. And through his conversion, Ignatius was
able to change it from himself to God as he practiced “nekkhamma” (detachment, renunciation) to his ego and his ego-driven
dream of romantic chivalry. And this enabled him to practice “anatta or anatman” (resolving ego and transcending ego) and “pabbajja or pravrajya” (leaving everything one had attached to behind and go on
journey for a new pursuit). If this process is not done, we cannot truly follow
Christ. Otherwise, we can easily revert to what we were attached to or sinful
life of the past.
Ignatius had multiple set-backs and obstacles on his
conversion journey. Even he came out of the “dark night of the soul”,
symbolized with the Manresa cave, and becoming a “buddha”, being enlightened to
the truth of finding God in all things, experiencing God’s omnipresence,
Ignatius was able to move forward with his firm resolve to follow Christ and
dedicate himself entirely to Christ.
To follow Christ as his disciple is to become a "buddha" in Christ. For this, we need to exercise “nekkhamma” for "pabbajja or pravrajya” and “anatta or anatman”. To live a life in Christ as "buddha" with the state of “anatta or anatman” is to die to ego and to have Christ living in self, as Paul reflected his experience in Galatians 2:20.
Having lived his life “Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam”, God called St. Ignatius of Loyola to home for
eternal life on July 31, 1556.
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